You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize