I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize
