all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
NoShamevember. You game?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
