i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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