My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
