Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Drake has all the answers
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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