Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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