oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
It all started with a game of naked twister.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
