So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
