i jhust puked up my retainher.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
