Can i not drive my cunt home
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
