what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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