I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
