windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
