Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Randomize
