JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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