I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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