Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
