you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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