ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
