We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
