so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
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