no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
