he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize