Fuck appropriateness.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Randomize
