Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
