Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
