your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
When are your genitals available?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
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