Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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