Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
