Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
