I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
