Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
