There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
sarcasm needs its own font
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
