just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
