I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
