Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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