i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
