come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
