oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize
