What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
