I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
