I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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