i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
