he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
How's work?
Spinning.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
