i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
