Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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