Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I understand Curling. That high.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
