I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
