I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
